I was at the mall today without my kids and a lady cleaning my wedding ring noticed my pregnant belly and said "Oh you look so young to be a mom." My thoughts were, "Lady, you have NO idea..." I didn't bother to mention I had an almost 8-year-old and 6-year-old at home, because why do I need this Zales ring lady to judge me? I wonder if she thought I was older or younger than my 26 years? And if I had told her my actual age would she think that it was an "acceptable" age to become a mother? Everyone has opinions about what age is best to start a family. I've heard people say that you should live your 20s without the responsibility of children so you can "find yourself" and blaa blaa blaa. But then once you hit 30 everyone is like, "When are you gonna start popping out kids? You know your clock is ticking, those eggs won't stay fresh forever." And God forbid you hit 35 without children, you might as well resign to life as an old maid.
I admit that I was younger than is most favorable for becoming a mother when I became pregnant at the tender age of 18. But honestly, not to toot my own horn or anything, I was and continue to be an amazing mother to my children. I breastfed exclusively for a year, and prided myself in the fact that she never had one drop of formula. All of her needs and most of her wants have always been met from day 1. When we decided to have another child when I was only 20 people thought we were so crazy, and yeah maybe we were, but the best thing we could do for our daughter was to give her a sibling to grow up with. Since then my two children have been the most important thing to me in my life. I expected to be judged for my decision to be a young mother, I accepted it and took it all in stride. Some of my greatest driving forces in finishing college and becoming a successful young adult were to prove to people that I could do it despite the fact that I was a young mother. Now after many many bumps in the road I am exactly where I want to be in my life, and Luke and I made the decision to bring another precious person into the world. My experience so far with this pregnancy has been overwhelmingly positive. It feels a lot different being pregnant as a legit young adult than it did as a teen, but all it takes is one comment from a random lady at the mall and I feel like I'm a judged 18 year old all over again.
Moral of the story, people will judge you and make assumptions about your life NO MATTER WHAT, and I shouldn't let it bother me. Maybe the lady meant it as a compliment, and I just look really good? I know I judge people all the time. When I hear about 18 year olds getting pregnant I am the biggest hypocrite in the world. I instantly judge them as making irresponsible life choices. I can't help it, but I should try to heed my own advice and try not to be so judgmental. Everyone is on different life paths, and there is no right or wrong way to live your own life. I'm on the right path for me and I've never been happier :-)
